acceptance

I really thought that this was going to be my final destination...but apparently my journey has not come to its end. There's a life out there for me, and I don't feel like just sitting down and not to follow my instinct. I never regret my coming back, 'cause it would be useless and tiring. I am too tired of listening to others, and this time, I want to make my own decisions--even though they can be very contradictive to theirs--and I'd try not to care when they say "I've told you, didn't I?"

Everyone has a problem. It's simply inevitable. They're just packaged in a way that human has to figure out the golden answer, which is there's only one: acceptance. Life's full of changes, good and bad, and as much as we want to avoid them, they'll always be by our side. When things don't go our way, we'll just have to live with it. It's one of life's greatest necessity, since those so called troublesome exist to enrich our soul. Just think of it, there's nothing better than the rich feeling of overcoming all those troubles away and carve it as our precious moments of greatness....true?

a r t i f i c i a l material

Met one of my college girl friend yesterday. Can't hardly believe how she's changed so drastically. I'm not saying that her change is in term of negative. Probably it's just me who is just not aware that human a r e supposed to make changes, physically and behaviorally, in the phases of their lives. I'd lift my hat up to salute one's bravery to change, but hers...I don't feel comfortable with.

She has been my clique for the past 7 years. Back in the days, she was the girl who always wears blue-striped Ocean Pacific polo shirt every once in two days and a plain black backpack. Now, she would never be caught wearing the same shirt in two weeks in a row. She's always covered with branded things, from top to bottom. A MNG top, NEXT jeans, NINE WEST pumps, GIORDANO belt, and embedded jewelry around her neck. Not to mention a glowing-looking-skin, Dr. Titi's-a famous dermatologist-polish. Sometimes, she'd wear her neon-green CROCS flats and say something like "Oh, these shoes are so comfy...it makes me feel like I'm not wearing any..."

It's not that I am jealous...at all! I have the capability to do the same as her, it's just that...She's been doing it a little too much!

Yesterday, when I took out my wallet to get some money to buy a drink. She glanced, and grabbed it from my hand. "New wallet heh?" I said, "Yea, it's NEXT. Got it from my former boss for my birthday present." She took a closer look-perhaps wondering how much it cost, the look on her face even said that she planned to take a look at the nearest NEXT shop to find the number written on the price tag the day after.

Oh my God, I was so amazed. Watching her means watching a total hedon. She became a super-spender with a boyfriend driving a BMW and a confused soul who thinks that brand is 'all that'. Along the way, my lips were shut, did not sure what to say, not knowing the person sitting on the front of the car, yapping about how cool it would be to have a wedding in Dharmawangsa Hotel, or live in the heart of South Jakarta with all the attributes attached.

I do not put the blame on her. Again, it's a matter of choice. But, for me...I think I'll stick to my weekly dose of Ambasador and Melawai clothes-hunt, and feel good about myself for not having to buy branded stuff to boost my confidence, thank you very much!

It's in the Cards

Do you have a flair for the arts? Are your familiar haunts the local theatre, art museum or pottery shop? If so, it appears that your cards are of the heart suit.

Heart suits are known for their creativity. This can come out in a painting, on the stage, through a poem, or something else entirely... It's no wonder your friends are most likely to find you in the dark room or in theatre rehearsal long after the last bell has rung.

On the other hand, those who share the heart suit can occasionally get caught up in drama. Hearts are known for their sensitive nature and emotional side. Since you are in touch with your feelings, it can be hard to control outbursts--especially when you are feeling hurt or frustrated.

Overall, though, your friends love your compassionate spirit and kind heart. Plus, you're usually game for a gallery opening or DIY project. What could be better?

I'm Baaaack....

After wandering in space for months, having blogger googled-so devastating that I gave up, and even made myself another blog -> http://nonamiranti.multiply.com, I finally succeeded in finding my way back home to my RollercoasteRide! Yaaaaaaay!

I've tried Multiply but since there's too many things waiting to be explored, yet so little IT skill, my blog ended up so 'garing' (sigh). A couple of months ago, I also joined this blog competition about Titan-a cooking supply shop that my sister loved going with the grandprize of 2.5 mill shopping voucher. Then, suddenly out of nowhere...I was connected by a network of jalansutra, kulinerkita & stuff like that (to think that I couldnt anything right...lately, I've been receiving recipes of 'Pasta Ubi Bakar', 'Pisang Saus Karamel' etc. It's fun..(kinda weird, but fun)

Anyways, as I've always felt comfy using this site to post my journals, I'd be posting a lot more of those 'travels' on a rollercoster here in this very site.

You'll never know...

"Loe tuh alpukat..Gw semangka..D**** melon. M*** pepaya. Ngerujak yuuuk!Huahahaha..."

You will never know how much a person means until that person is not there beside you anymore.

That is exactly what I felt when one of my precious loved ones didn't want to consider me as a friend no more. I felt so low. When I thought I had it all figured out, suddenly came a thunder that ruined them altogether at once. I understand that apart of this was caused by my own foolishness (which I still regret till this very second), but I believe that a bond needs compromises as well.

I've learned my lesson...and I apologize for breaking my promise, for disappointing you, for being ignorant & selfish, for making white lies so everyone would be happy (which apparently made things worse in the end!).

Gosh, (even though this sounds like the cheesiest thing, but...)I love you too dearly...I wish you'd forgive me. I wish we could start over.

If a 'sorry' cant mend what we had, then...we'll just have to get by and start living like strangers.

(which would be the last thing I want to do, ever in my life...)

they're only words

letter by letter, forming a word...
word by word blending a thought...
thought by thought delivers a message...
creating feelings, controlling what lies within, driving the captivation untold ever...
everything happens for a reason.
every soul connected for some thing,
it's gotta be something...(i can tell!)

everything happens for a reason.
why you? why me? why now? why wonder? why not?

I hear ya, loud & clear!

My 3rd week. Piling the remains of my dazes & confusions, workin' my way to put the puzzle in order. Looking back, (damn!) I feel so lucky. Having the chance to take a dip of this & that, measure my highs & lows to the limit, lively sober--fortunately. They all came to the point where I least expected.

As I'm so NOT a BaTam (BanciTampil), never have I imagined to have my pic taken for 'her world', hooked up all silly and goofy in a magic show (nationally broadcasted), experience administrating print ads flow in a TV station, and incidentally occupied with lotsa crazy stuff I would just day dream about!

Singledom, my kingdom, away boredom, with a sip of Dom Perignon (hohoho!)

Onward we go, ma dear :)